Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
I have to say, the whole all black matrix suit (but kind of more chic than anything in the matrix?) and swath of blue eyeshadow (which she seems to have infinite quantities of, of course) is fierce as hell.
Oh, and it's a really good anime too!
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
I won't lie -- I peed a lot for this one. So much epicness has been set up, and has a super fan of the book series, it was really everything I could have hoped for.
It’s official: Ned has lost his head. Yoren bundles Arya up, carries her to an alley, tells her to act like a boy, and chops off her hair. He plans to take her North, out of the city. Sansa remains trapped in Joffrey’s creepy court, where he has a bard’s tongue cut out for singing a bawdy (awesome) song about how Robert Baratheon was whipped and that the Lannisters killed him. That done, he’s finished with court for the day and leaves the rest to his mother. He then takes Sansa out to see her father’s head out on the battlements. He tells her charming things like how he’s going to pack a baby in her as soon as it’s physically possible, and hits her by proxy (as this is much more gallant you see). She contemplates jumping off the small wooden bridge they’re on and taking Joffrey with her, but the Hound (now a member of the Kingsguard in case you didn’t notice his armour) stops her and tells her to give Joffrey what he wants. And gives her a hanky for her bloody lip.
It turns out that Cersei is now banging Bad Hair Lancel Lannister, and that war is now official. Also doddering old Grand Maester Pycelle is banging Roz, and we get some more sexposition while he talks about how he knew the Mad King Aerys. As it turns out, the old coot is spryer than he seems too, though I’m not exactly sure what to do with this information. Baelish and Varys spar again! Yay! They only do this because they love each other’s deviousness of course.
Yoren tells Arya she’s now Arry the Orphan Boy, and she better not forget it if she doesn’t want to be turned in for a pardon or even better, first raped and then turned in for a pardon. She almost immediately gets picked on by the bullies in the group, but she shows them. Sword style. Plus Gendry (!! Robert’s bastard in case you forgot) steps in and helps her out. And he still has his bull helm.
Bran has the dream about the three eyed crow again, only this time it’s telling him to go to the crypt to see his father. So he gets Osha to help him get down there, and she’s scared to do so for some reason (too many dead bodies coming back to life beyond the Wall, I suppose), and Bran tells her about his grandfather and aunt and their tragic ends. They also find little Rickon and his feral direwolf hiding down there because he had the same dream as Bran. They don’t literally find him there of course, but when they come back up Winterfell’s maester is there with the news of Ned’s death.
Catelyn has also heard the news and escapes the camp to grieve but finds her son in the woods, not taking it well. He vows to kill all the Lannisters in his mother’s arms, but she reminds him that they have to get his sisters back first.
Robb’s bannermen discuss siding with Renly, but Robb is of the same mind of his father – the throne should go to Stannis. The Greatjon cares nothing for either of them, and suggests the North should become an independent kingdom again, with Robb as its king. Even Theon Greyjoy bends the knee to this. Catelyn then goes to see Jaime Lannister in their makeshift prison, where he makes some pretty smart comments (he’s clearly learned something about being a prisoner from his little bro) and Catelyn bashes him in the face with a rock. He almost looks sad sitting there tied up to a tree. But he’s honest with Catelyn and tells her everything about Bran’s fall except what he saw.
The Lannister camp
The Lannisters and their allies are also taking stock in the wake of Ned’s death. They too realize there can be no peace now. Tywin is almost mad with the loss of Jaime, but he starts to notice the talents of his younger son, now that it looks like he might be stuck with just him. Tywin decides to regroup at Harrenhall with the rest of his men while he sends Ser Gregor out to terrorize the countryside. More interesting, he sends Tyrion to court as Hand to control the situation there in his stead. He tells him not to bring Shae, though. Shae is upset at this news, but Tyrion has no intention of following that command.
OK never mind, it looks like Jon is going to desert. Sam tries to stop him, but gets knocked over instead (he’s almost the Chris Pratt of GoT). Jon is out galloping in the woods when he hears what he thinks are senior Night’s Watchmen pursuing him, but he stops and turns around when he hears Sam’s squeals as he gets knocked off his horse (Oh Sam). It turns out he IS being pursued by Night’s Watchmen, but it’s his friends, not like, the commander. They remind him not just of his duty but that he has people he loves there as well. And they need him more.
Turns out Commander Mormont knows about Jon’s midnight ride, but he doesn’t seem to care since he came back. Apparently it’s not uncommon for someone to run away for the night, although usually they head straight for the nearest brothel. Also it turns out Mormont needs every man in the Watch, as he’s about to mount a campaign beyond the Wall. Not only are dead men walking and ancient evils stirring, but the Wildings also seem to be banding together as well. And the Lord Commander would much rather not sit around waiting for any of these things to kill him.
The Dothraki “Horde”
Dany awakens and finds out her son was born deformed, and did not live because they entered the tent. The khalesar has left because they will only follow strength, leaving her with one bloodrider, Ser Jorah, and a couple handfuls of slaves with nowhere else to go. Despite her sacrifice, all that remains of Drogo is a slobbering sack of meat. Mirri Maz Dur reveals her treachery, that she knew what she was doing when she cast that spell, and Dany is furious and heartbroken. She tries desperately to find her husband inside his shell, but he’s not there. She says her goodbyes and smothers him with a pillow. He doesn’t even fight her.
Dany burns her husband’s body on a pyre, and Dany sends him off with her dragon’s eggs. Oh, and Mirri Maz Dur. And herself. Jorah tries to convince her not to. She frees her slaves and proclaims herself the dragon’s daughter, but some still leave. Then she steps into the pyre. No one seems to know what to make of this until they awake in the morning and find Daenarys still very much alive. Naked and covered with soot….and DRAGONS. After several hundred years, the dragon eggs have hatched, and Dany is now Mother of Dragons. Everyone there bows, and Jorah and Rhekaro proclaim themselves her bloodriders. And…SCENE.
- Outfits of the week: Sansa and Daenarys. I'm not sure if Dany was wearing her wedding dress (I remember it being purple, not blue), but it's certainly not a coincidence either way. Also did you notice that Sansa is no longer wearing the locket Joffrey gave her? Although she is dressed a lot like Cersei in previous episodes (before her husband's death she wore a very similar pink dress a lot), which I also don't think is a coincidence, being the future Queen and all.
- Line of the week: “Do you fear my gash” On Varys, you and Petyr Baelish should bring that show on the road. You’re like Westeros’ very own Abbott and Costello.
- I realize I stopped counting boobs and blood, because honestly, WHO CARES. Also the “sexposition” as it’s come to be called is kind of hilarious. And Deadwood did it too. Constantly. Most of Swerengen’s monologues occurred mid-fellatio. So it’s not like HBO’s never done it before.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Also: Zooey's new comedy this fall (or maybe winter? who the eff knows these days) looks like it's gonna be great.
Friday, June 17, 2011
It’s the penultimate episode this week, the second to last, the one that all readers of the series have been expecting all season. And I think they did good. I know I definitely cried the first time I watched it. The shit has not only hit the fan this episode but now it’s flying all over the room. PLUS a Salon reviewer has rewatched all 9 current episodes at once, and has taken back his initial reservations about the series. There may even have been comparisons to Deadwood. So ha! Suck it haters!
Robb has reached the Twins, the gateway to the South and the Riverlands, which is where the Lannisters are doing their terrorizing. There is no way to get across without the permission of the lord there, Walder Frey, who is known to be quite…mercenary, to say the least. It’s too dangerous for Robb to go alone, and would be seen as an attack if he went with guards, so Catelyn goes instead, as she has the least value as a hostage.
Frey is a delightfully cranky old coot with a million children and a new 15 year old wife. He’s also pricklier than a cactus and sees everything as a slight. Frey knows he has the upper hand here, because if he just leaves the Northmen there the Lannisters will have no problem picking them off, and he’ll prove his loyalty to the crown, where he has nothing really to gain from letting them cross for nothing. Luckily his pride is possibly bigger than Tywin Lannister’s, and he wants nothing more than a marriage alliance with a major house. So Catelyn rides back with not only permission to cross, but a Frey alliance. But it’s at a fairly high cost – both Arya and Robb are to marry one of those sad looking Freys. Theon can’t help but chuckle when Robb tries to find out if all the Frey girls are ugly (they are), but he has no choice but to consent to their terms, and the Northmen are able to continue their march south.
Lord Commander Mormont gives Jon his family sword (instead of Jorah!!) as thanks for saving his life. Mormont even sends Ser Alliser south to tell the King of their troubles up there, and to keep him and Jon off each other’s throats. There’s a cute moment in the kitchens where all Jon’s friends chant to play with Jon’s shiny new sword, reminding us all how young they are. Sam has something he doesn’t want to tell Jon too, but of course he caves and tells Jon about Robb marching south. Jon is of course despondent for not being at his brother’s side.
Maester Aemon then summons Jon to help him feed the ravens (which looks gross), and reminds him of his duty, because he knows that Sam would tell him the news. He tells him that “love is the death of duty”, which is why the Night’s Watch is not allowed to have families, and also reveals his own true identity – that of Aemon Targaryen. And when his entire House went down in flames in Robert’s rebellion, there was nothing he could do, because not only was he bound to the Watch, but he was old and blind already. Jon’s face is kind of priceless as he realizes this. But this story definitely seems to school him, because we don’t see Jon Snow running for his horse this time.
The Dothraki Horde
Khal Drogo is not looking good at all (zombie makeup anyone?) and falls from his horse. The bloodriders of course give Daenarys lip for being a woman, but ultimately do as she commands and make camp. Drogo is by now feverish and raving, his wound now a festering mess. He is most likely dying. Dany refuses to accept this, and Jorah tries to convince her to leave, because she and her child will most likely be killed by Drogo’s rivals in the fighting that will ensue after his death. He reminds her they are a people who do not honour blood, only strength, and while she’s stronger than she’s ever been, she’s not strong enough for that. Or at least not strong enough in the right way. She still refuses to leave. The lippy bloodrider blames the healer again, and Dany actually stands up for herself (!!) and saves Mirri maz Duur from a beating again.
Dany begs the healer woman to use the magic the Dothraki keep saying she possesses to cure the Khal, to bring him back to life. But this is blood magic she’s asking for, and the Khal’s horse is summoned to give his life for his master’s. The Dothraki are terrified, but Daenarys is resolute. Everyone must leave the tent, including herself, and no one can enter lest they interrupt the spell. Scary noises start coming out of there, and the lippy bloodrider knocks Dany over and tries to enter the tent. Luckily, Jorah is suited up and takes the bloodrider out, knight style. But the fall has induced labour, and the Dothraki midwives refuses to tend to their khaleesi now she has summoned blood magic, so Jorah unwittingly brings her into the tent where the maegi is.
The Lannister Camp
Tyrion has dinner with his father, who tells him he and his mountain tribesmen will be in the vanguard in the coming battle (that’s the very front, in case you’re wondering). Tyrion is of course not too happy with this death sentence. But all is not so bad! Bronn found him a pretty whore (and by found, we of course mean took from some other dude)! And not just pretty, but also possibly French! And mysterious! Shae was not really like this in the books at all, but I have to say I don’t really mind the change. She’s much more interesting this way. Tyrion makes her an offer she can’t refuse (his company? What lady can say no to that? Eff the gold!) and she goes to town on him.
Later, Bronn, Shae and Tyrion play sleepover games over wine. No seriously. They literally play Truth or Dare. It’s awesome. Tyrion nails Bronn, but Shae he can’t pin down. She’s also wearing Tyrion’s leather jerkin, which is adorable. Then the tables get turned and Tyrion is the one who winds up with Truth, and we all get the story of Tyrion’s teenage marriage. He married a common girl when he was 16, which of course did not sit well with “The House Comes First” Tywin. Jaime reveals the girl to be a whore, and Tywin has her take a turn with all of his guards for a silver each and makes Tyrion watch. Bronn of course says he would kill any man who did that to him, and Shae chastises him for not knowing she was a whore, but apparently she still finds the story endearing because Tyrion gets more loving, and Bronn awkwardly makes his exit.
Tyrion wakes up the next morning hungover, to the sounds of battle. So he suits up by himself (cuz Daddy’s too cheap to get him a squire), Bronn gives him the hilarious advice to “stay low”. Tyrion pumps up the mountain folk with a speech, and then immediately gets knocked on the head with a battle hammer and trampled a bit. He wakes up in his little lion armour, the battle over, dazed but alive. The Lannisters have won, but there were only 2000 Stark men, not 20,000 like the scouts said. That’s because while Tywin was busy preparing for the 20, 000, Robb took the rest and ambushed Jaime Lannister and his 100 men. Jaime, like Tyrion, is a pretty glib hostage. Jaime tries to take Robb mano a mano, but Robb’s not stupid enough to fall for that one. And so our young Stark seems poised to take over the story as its hero.
Varys pays Ned another cell visit, and tells us all a little bit about his childhood – he used to be part of an acting troupe(which explains so much) but he still refuses to let Ned free even though he probably could. Instead he again counsels Ned to take back what he said about Joffrey’s parentage, proclaim his loyalty to the crown, tell his son call off his army, and then Cersei will allow him to take the Black and serve out the rest of his days in the Night’s Watch. Varys again counsels for peace, as this is really the only way to achieve it. Ned however, is not afraid of dying, but Varys reminds him that the Lannister have Sansa, and it will be she who suffers for his honour.
Arya is out on the streets of King’s Landing, just another beggar child catching pigeons and not understanding how to barter. Some other street children tell her that her father is being brought to the Sept and she scurries after them and gets a good vantage point on a statue of Baelor the Blessed. Ned even sees her and yells to Yoren of the Night’s Watch that she’s there as he passes him in the crowd. Ned actually IS there to confess his ‘treason’, exactly as he’s been counselled so many times to do. But despite that, Joffrey calls for his head anyone, completely to the surprise of his mother and counsellors. Ser Illyn takes Ned’s head, and the little psycho starts his rein with civil war.
- I hate to say it, but outfit of the week goes to Cersei and Joffrey, whose cape/coat deal was pretty dope. Although Sansa’s blue dress looks a lot better with a big silver belt.
- “Penetrate the enigma that is me” Oh Tyrion.
- Also: if you have ever wondered what a Tyrion/Bronn buddy comedy would look like, it’s this.
- Theories on Shae’s background: she is actually noble, but left to explore the world and possibly avoid a marriage to an old man, and actually enjoys being a whore, OR she was sold to a brothel at a very young age and trained to be a very good whore like Dany’s hand maiden, but she somehow escaped. But she still does actually enjoy her profession.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Saturday, June 11, 2011
OMG yay! A GoT red carpet!! I have to say, pretty good job for a newbie there Emilia (Daenarys Targaryen, in case you don't recognize her without her blonde wig), but next time get some coloured heels instead of nude ones. Especially when you're wearing white!
Friday, June 10, 2011
See the full collection here.
Mintdesigns: COLOUR! PATTERN! Also loving the futuristic vibe that I didn't see a lot of in the Japanese collections. And the crazy neon hats. Plus all the dresses kind of look like pyjamas which I am totally down with.
See the full collection here.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Loving the coats over at Kamishima Chinami, although I'm not sure if some of the proportions are working on some of the outfits (I am looking at you shiny blue outfit). Check it out here.
Love the twists on traditional menswear at ethosens. They not only mix fabrics but make items like suits out of unexpected fabrics like sweatshirt material. It looks very, very comfortable and yet also chic. Check out the whole collection here at Japanese Streets.
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Love it! Lots of colour, retro references, but with a Japanese twist by playing with volume and proportion (something that seems to be pretty typical of Japanese designers). I want one of those hats. Also I should totally get some knee socks.
See more at Japanese Streets.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Shit continues to hit the fan in the land of Westeros this week. Executions are imminent, war is all but proclaimed, little girls are forced to stab people, zombies and giant penises are exposed! Exciting stuff.
The show opens in the best way possible, with Syrio Forel teaching dancing to Arya. And she’s getting really good! Unfortunately though, the rest of the household is being slaughtered. Sansa’s dress flows beautifully as she tries to run to safety, but really, where is there she can go that is safe in King’s Landing? Syrio manages to teach Arya an important lesson about the true seeing when guards try to take her away. But they’re Lannister guards, and Arya and Syrio realize something is up. Syrio manages to take out like 4 fully armoured knights WITH A WOODEN SWORD so Arya can get away. She tries to get him to come with her, but he knows if he does she won’t get away in time.
Arya gets away because she knows the hidden passageways and back passages of the castle, and Sansa is pretty much immediately caught by the Hound. A stable boy tries to take Arya as she’s searching their fallen luggage for Needle, and she accidently kills him.
Varys visits Ned in the dungeon, and brings him water and news (considering how he’s been baiting Ned all season to find out about Joffrey’s parentage, he kind of owes him). Varys calls him a fool for going to Cersei first with his knowledge, and that it was probably the impetus for the King’s death. Oh, and Catelyn doesn’t have Tyrion anymore, meaning the Lannisters have nothing stopping them from killing Ned. Ned asks Varys who he serves, and he replies, “The realm”. And I actually believe him. He’s playing his own game, obviously, but I think he actually does want to bring true stability back to Westeros.
Sansa is brought to the Queen and council, and they tell her about her father’s treachery (though not the details, obviously). Sansa begs to remain Joffrey’s fiancée, so they make her write a letter to her brother and mother to get them to come to King’s Landing and swear their fealty. Sansa wants to see her Dad, to talk to him, but of course they can’t allow that, and she is shamed out of that notion right quick.
Sansa eventually goes to Joffrey’s first meeting of court, where those who moved against Ned Stark are rewarded for their treachery (if you listen carefully, you hear the captain of the city guard being given quite a large holding and being made a lord). Tywin is appointed Hand (again). Ser Barristan, being the only person who did try to side with Ned, is stripped of his office. Barristan knows exactly what is going down here, and storms off instead of taking the lands they’re clearly trying to placate him with. Sansa tries to beg for her father’s life using her only weapons – her beauty and her manners. But it doesn’t seem to be enough (although Varys does try to sway opinion to her side). Joffrey will only offer mercy if her father takes back what he said about his birth, and I think we all know Ned well enough by now to know that will never happen since he knows for sure it’s the truth.
Jon and Sam find the bodies to go along with that hand that Ghost found last week, and they bring them back to Castle Black. Commander Mormont wants them examined before they’re burned though, even though that’s what the Wildings to with their dead (and with good reason, it turns out). A raven arrives, and it turns out to be bearing the news from King’s Landing. Mormont summons his steward to his quarters to tell him what has happened to his father, and warns Jon that he cannot leave the Wall to help them. He’s made his bed with the Night’s Watch, and now he has to lie in it.
Ser Alliser decides that it’s a perfect time to goad Jon in the kitchens later though, and Jon goes at him with a knife. Mormont sees this and is not pleased. Jon is confined to quarters. Ghost starts flipping out and scratches at the door incessantly, and Jon goes out to investigate. Turns out they should have burned those bodies after all, because those suckers are walking around now (and the one he encounters looks delightfully like a certain member of the Addams family) and fire seems to be the only thing that slows them down. Jon is redeemed though, when he saves the Lord Commander’s life.
As they burn the walking dead in the morning, Sam tells them the few things he has managed to find out about the White Walkers in Maester Aemon’s library, and it ain’t good. The dead will walk, the white walkers are coming, and the Wall might not be enough to hold them back now that they’ve reawakened.
Catelyn is pissed at her sister for not giving her the news about her husband from King’s Landing immediately. Lysa and her son continue to be creepy, and not only that, but she refuses to help Cat. Nope, Lysa and the knights of the Vale are staying put in their impenetrable fortress. Practically, it’s not the worst plan, but it is pretty cold given the circumstances.
Tyrion and Bronn are most of the way down the mountain by now when they get ambushed by the hill tribes that lurk in the area. But Tyrion of course manages to win them over by saying awesome things and promising them money, arms, and even the Vale itself once they’ve cleared out the Arryns. Tyrion gathers the rest of the tribes with the same promises and manages to reach his father’s camp. The red tents obviously were not invented for stealth, but then the Lannisters are definitely arrogant enough to not care how easy their army is to find. Tyrion introduces the rest of the hill tribes (plus Bronn), although his father doesn’t seem too happy with him still, ashamed that his son didn’t manage to put up more of a fight. We learn that Jaime is doing well in his campaign, and Tyrion is caught up on all the news.
Tywin does actually agree his son’s bargain with the hill folk, and even offers them more of they join the Lannister host. They agree, but only as long as Tyrion sticks with them, to the point where he has to fight with them. Tyrion’s face at this proviso is priceless.
Robb receives the letter from Sansa, but he and the Maester see right through her words. They know it’s really from the Queen. They also realize it’s a trap. So Robb chooses to answer her summons, but not alone – he’ll go south only with the full force of Winterfell’s bannermen behind him. The other men of the North are appropriately tough and grizzled. A particularly amazing bear of a man called the Greatjon argues with Robb over leading the vanguard, and Robb manages to earn his respect by not giving in to his demands and having his wolf eat two of his fingers. No one questions Robb’s authority after that. The Greatjon even laughs. They don’t make pussies in the North, that’s for sure.
The army leaves in the night so as not to be seen by Lannister spies and Robb says goodbye to little Bran and leaves him in charge of Winterfell. The littlest Stark, Rickon, appears out of the shadows, and is adorably, heartbreakingly, sad. He doesn’t think anyone is coming back. Bran then goes to the Godswood to pray for his brother’s safety, where he meets Osha. Being from beyond the Wall, she too believes in the Old Gods. Hodor appears, naked as the day he’s born, and we learn that there are not only zombies and White Walkers beyond the wall, but giants too, and Hodor must have some giant blood in him to be so big. Apparently this can only be confirmed by seeing the penis. Osha tells Bran that his prayers might be for naught, because the Old Gods no longer hold sway in the South (the godswoods there have been torn up ages ago), and also tries to warn him that the army is marching the wrong way. But the army’s already gone and Bran is ten, so there’s really nothing that can be done about it.
Catelyn rides to meet Robb’s host, and the men are dismissed so Robb can hug his mom in privacy (he is, after all, only a 17 year old boy). The men seem to be pretty optimistic about defeating the Lannisters though. Robb shows his mother Sansa’s letter and she learns the fate of her daughters. Catelyn reminds her son of what is at stake if his loses, namely, that they’re all dead. There’s no turning back now.
Robb decides they need to cross the bridge into the south at the Twins before they can take on either of the Lannister armies (and the Lord there sounds like an opportunistic son of a bitch), when a Lannister scout is found. The scout of course gets sent off with a ‘message’ instead of being killed, just because that’s way awesomer.
The Dothraki Horde
Dany saves women from the least convincing rape ever (seriously, we get the “fingerbang soliloquy” [thanks Vulture!] last week, but we can’t handle a convincing rape scene? They just like, push those women around a little bit. Their DANCES are more rapey than that!) and the Dothraki horde still looks like it consists of about ten people. But I do enjoy Jorah’s Hercules shirt (although why he’s wearing it now, when they’re ACTUALLY IN BATTLE instead of earlier I have no idea). The Dothraki are at war now to fund their war on the Seven Kingdoms, but that doesn’t mean Daenarys still approves of their brutality.
The bloodrider she interrupts runs off to the Khal and whines she won’t let him have his fun. Drogo tells her this is the way of war, but Dany won’t back down, and the Khal is pleased by her fierceness. So he and the bloodrider have it out to the death, and Drogo wins using his bare hands, and rips out the man’s entire throat with his tongue attached. It’s kind of badass. Drogo is wounded though, and one of the slaves claims to be a healer who can help him. The Dothraki claim she is a witch and don’t seem to trust her, but Dany does, and Drogo relents to her request that he let this witch tend to him. Dun dun DUN.
- Outfit of the week goes to Sansa, who seems to finally have found a dress that isn’t two sizes too big.
- I don’t understand why the titles are still on Vaes Dothrak when they clearly left last week.
- Tyrion continues to have the best lines: “How would you like to die?” “At age 80, in my bed, with a girl’s mouth around my cock.” “There are many differences between me and my brother. He’s braver. I’m better looking.”
- Those ravens must be magic, cuz damn they’re fast.
- Also this episode was written by the book’s author himself, G.R.R. Martin, who will also be writing episode 8 next season.
- Also OMG OMG THE NEXT BOOK IS OUT IN A MONTH. MINE IS DEF. PREORDERED.